Sharing is Caring
by Ander
Summary: Sometimes we need a little help from some really strong alcohol. Thanks to some Asgardian mead, Steve finally gets that help.


While the Asgardian mead that Thor had brought along hadn't been enough to get Steve drunk, it was potent enough to actually give him a buzz that left him feeling relaxed and rather mellow. Strangely enough it was this very state of relaxation that allowed him to actually make some head way when it came to dealing with the ball of repressed emotion that he had spent so much time nurturing since he awoke from the ice. However justified his inner turmoil may have been since waking up and finding out that pretty much everything and everyone he knew was dead and gone or very close to it he really needed to stop worrying about what he had lost and start thinking about what he had gained.

For one, he was alive when he was positive that he was going to die when he crashed into the water. Waking up seventy years in the future may have been shattering, but the fact of the matter is that he really shouldn't have woken up at all. He missed out on the love and life that his Commandoes and Peggy got to enjoy, but he would have missed that if he had actually died anyway. It was disappointing that he pretty much had to step right back into fighting but what else would he be doing? Realistically his options were limited to fighting the good fight, letting himself get turned into a lab rat, or letting himself be turned back into a dancing monkey for the government again. There was no way he would be able to settle down into a "normal" life and since he was being honest with himself he's damned sure that he wouldn't want to anyway.

Bucky being alive could possibly be counted as another positive. Being able to think about the issue without needing to simultaneously reign in his rampaging guilt made things a lot clearer. Come to think of it, there was no way to tell if the Winter Soldier was actually Bucky or just someone wearing his face. He could have died from his fall and then had his body reanimated through one of Hydra's experiments or he could even just be a Hydra operative that had been given plastic surgery to wear the face of his oldest friend. Actually, if the Winter Soldier really is Bucky it might be better if he never regains his old memories. The Bucky that he knew would never be able to handle the guilt of what the Winter Soldier had done at the command of Hydra. Perhaps it would be better to just step back and let things play out. If Bucky remembered himself then he would come to Steve if he needed or wanted his help. He had made the effort to help Bucky already and nearly let himself get killed doing it. His friend would never forgive him if he threw away his life for no reason at all. Besides, it's not like he and Sam were actually getting anywhere in their search. All they were doing was wasting time and money. If Bucky could evade all of the effort that had been put into finding him then he should be fine on his own.

Speaking of friends, he really hadn't been a very good one to anyone else on his current team. The vast majority of his effort had gone to mourning the old friends that he had already lost or into searching for the one old friend that was doing his best to avoid him. As painful as it was to admit to himself, what he had been doing was rather selfish in a way. At the very least needed to make an effort to get to know his team as Steve Rogers and not as Captain America. It was really no wonder that he was still the butt of so many jokes from the team. No one likes to follow the lead of someone that isn't relatable and by presenting them with his Cap persona almost exclusively he definitely wasn't being relatable. He really hadn't put forth as much effort as he should have into adapting to this new time. Come to think of it, a lot of the issues him and Tony could be solved just by actually showing the man that he was Steve Rogers instead of constantly being Captain America on and off the field of battle. With that thought, Steve decided that it was time to rejoin the party inside instead standing outside alone on a balcony.

Naturally the first person to talk to him when he took a seat along with the others was Tony and of course the first thing that came out of Tony's mouth was an allusion to the status of his virginity thinly disguised as a question.

"So Capsicle, found the time to lose that pesky virginity card lately? It's not exactly doing a lot for the team's image having a 90 year old virgin as our leader."

Even though he was expecting something along those lines he still almost replied that it wasn't anyone's business before he caught himself and thought better of it. All of the women he had been with were either long since dead or soon to be anyway. It's not like he would be hurting any of their reputations by actually sharing some personal information. This kind of thing was normal for friends in this time to talk about after all. He might as well get to work on being a real friend to his teammates.

"Tony, as much as I know you enjoy calling me a virgin, I think I'll make you think of something else to make fun of me for. I can't bring myself to share details like names with everyone, but I did spend months touring with fourteen single showgirls who were willing to do whatever they could to keep troop morale up. On top of that, I was really stressed out about being turned into what amounted to a singing monkey and trying to deal with my new body. Think about what the serum did to me. It enhanced _everything._ Now, just imagine going from being a skinny asthmatic that women didn't give the time of day to suddenly looking like I do now. I put on a good act because it seems to be what everyone expects of me but I'm very, very far from being a virgin.

Leave it to Bruce to get over his surprise at the revelation of his captain enjoying the delights of fourteen showgirls to ask for more detail about what _everything_ entailed. "What do you mean when you say everything? I know more about the serum than probably anyone else here besides you and nothing was ever documented beyond it increasing your strength, speed, healing and stamina. It was implied that it made you a perfect physical specimen but there was nothing about other effects."

"You also have to keep in mind that those areas were really the only ones anyone in the government were worried about. They wanted super-soldiers after all. They didn't even care to ask me about anything beyond a quick question about how I was feeling right after the procedure. After that, they just ran some tests and then Senator Brandt decided that I could sing for my supper."

Since looking around revealed that everyone was still completely focused on him he decided that he may as well come completely clean about the serum with everyone. Maybe knowing about the other effects would allow everyone to understand exactly why he kept himself under such tight control most of the time and why he always had such strong reactions to certain things.

"When I said _everything_ I meant just that. _Everything._ Strength, speed, healing, and stamina you already pointed out but I bet you didn't consider my senses. Everyone knows that the serum corrected my color-blindness but I have 20:1 vision now. On top of that, my eyes track movement way, way faster than they did before. I can hear whispered conversations from across a room. Hell, I can't track people by how they smell but if I'm familiar with the person I can tell who they are if they are standing next to me in a pitch-black room. On top of that, my brain was enhanced to process information faster as well. That's how I come up with battle plans so fast. It's not just that I lead a team during the war. I receive more information from my senses than the rest of you do and my brain is able to process all of that information very, very quickly. Combine that with my experience and I can come up with a workable plan in no time."

"My emotions and desires were heightened as well. It took me quite a while to get a handle on things. Things that were once annoying before the serum were almost enough to send me into a rage after it and things that made me slightly happy were enough to nearly bring me to tears. Now, imagine going from a reduced libido caused by being sick my whole life to being perfectly healthy and surrounded by fourteen beautiful and willing women. On top of that, consider the fact that I can easily spot pupil dilation, hear shifts in breathing and increased heart rate and sometimes even smell arousal. Oh, and don't forget about the upgraded stamina. My virginity really didn't stand a chance."

The incredulous stares that he received from Tony and Clint combined with the booming laughter from Thor, dazed expression from Bruce, and calculating/intrigued look from Natasha were enough bring a warm smile to Steve's face. It really wasn't much, but to him it felt like he'd just taken a big step towards turning his team into real friends.


End file.
